Forza Horizon: The Fun & Joy Cruiser...

For the first time ever in console gaming history, I can finally drive the Toyota FJ Cruiser on Forza Horizon thanks to the February Jalopnik Car Pack and what can I say? Maybe the FJ in the FJ Cruiser name really stands for Fun and Joy. It's a Fun and Joy cruiser but never mind the buzzcocks, ladies and gents, because there's a hundred reasons why I'm always wanted to drive one of those and that's too much so let's shorten things up...

Yeah right, it really was a Japanese Hummer!

The Eastern Steel

The main downside about the FJ Cruiser is...well not in terms of mechanical details,...is this car's getting a bit old. This car has been with us for seven years (three years since its Japanese debut in December 2010) but despite its age, there has been numerous buyers for this JDM off-roader. A Japanese off-roader with an American accent, the FJ Cruiser sure knows that it has always been the Asian-American party goer for the adventurous Horizon players. I once drove this one at the Carson Golf Course, which is near the Media Center, and in the game of Infection, the FJ Cruiser sure knows how to evade a supercar and wait a minute...supercars really don't work on a place like these. They may have more power and work only on asphalt but in such conditions like the Carson Golf Course because of rough terrain, it's difficult to keep a high-powered ride survive through these conditions and in the game of Infection....total disaster.

This FJ Cruiser though, although its not a good substitute to the V6-powered Wrangler, it sure loves the jumps and humps of the Golf Course and thus making a game of INFECTION a little more interesting. Don't thank the off-roader, thank the X-REAS that served as the foundation for the FJ Cruiser's handling.

The Beast of the East strikes Horizon!

City Slicker

Even though Forza Horizon is a car-enthusiast's sandbox, the FJ Cruiser really turns Horizon into an ultimate hunting ground because sometimes the hunted has became the hunter. It may not be a good idea to race against other Speedo Boys in their high-performance cars but in playground games, this leviathan really hunts down its prey. Is it a hunter or the hunted? You decide the fate for the FJ Cruiser...

Finding the ultimate hunting ground

Citroen DS3 Cabrio

The Citroen DS3...It's been around for three years but the X Factor behind the beauty of the DS3 still never gets old these days. It's the glam that keeps the DS3 fashionable and because this is the best looking hatchback made by the French, I was starting to be fascinated by its looks and its subtlety. From what I'm thinking at, the comfort of the DS3 has the premium of an expensive luxury car and with such gadgetry, there's something that really amazed me. This is somewhat France's answer to Fiat 500 of some sorts and hey, Citroen's taking the page from its Fiat 500 rival by creating a Cabrio version of Citroen's most fashionable hatchback in the world...

2014 Citroen DS3 Cabrio

Hmmm....even when they said Cabrio, guess this isn't more of an open-top treat but as I may know, it comes with the stylish canvas roof that can be opened or closed in just 16 seconds. With the canvas top closed, it looks like the same DS3 but with the canvas top opened, this is a DS3 on a totally new level. However, there is one drawback about this cabrio model and even though Citroen didn't take away the roof off, the DS3 Cabrio weighs 25 kilos more than the normal model, probably because of structural reinforcements around the boot.

Despite being 25kg more, I am glad to say that whoever accidentally owned a Citroen C3 Pluriel, the one with the very complicating roof mechanism on that takes the owner minutes or hours to open or close it, might find solace on the DS3 Cabrio. That's good news though, I want this one more than the useless C3 Pluriel, that's for sure. Besides, unlike the Pluriel, the DS3 Cabrio's canvas top can be closed and opened at the touch of a button. You'll be glad to have one of these though...

In terms of engine choices, the DS3 Cabrio carries on with the VTi 120, THP 155, VTi 82, and the e-HDi 90 Airdream engine choices here and depending on the engine types, the driver may chose between a 5-speed manual, 6-speed manual, 4-speed automatic, and a 6-speed semi-automatic transmission. As for the pricing, it starts at 18,800 Euros, this is more pricey than the normal DS3 model but never mind about that, it's still one of the most stylish hatchbacks ever made with the canvas top on it that can be opened and closed  at the touch of the button though. In fact, I'm starting to like this poshier version of the hatchback that's already being the posh one. A DS3 is already posh but a DS3 with the canvas top on it is even more posh. It's what posh people want...metaphorically speaking...

Photo: PSA Peugeot Citroen

America's toughest cars

Another day, another American Top Gear...

This time, the boys are on the search for America's most durable vehicle. Adam chose a Chevy Caprice, Tanner chose a rear-wheel-drive Toyota Corolla coupe, and Rut chose a Volvo 240 estate.

They put these cars in series of torture tests. They tried dropping their cars, shooting it off, and some races. After series of tortured events, Tanner's Corolla won the challenge, giving him the chance to test out the brand new Mercedes-Benz G63 AMG...

Tanner finds out if the G-Class has some military heritage on it and what he did is put it in the test by driving the G63 while being hunted down by the US Army.

The US Army thrown everything they've got; drone, helicopters, military vehicles, even infantry troops. Tanner did everything he can to lose the heat but then just right near the finish line, the troops set up a roadblock and...BUSTED! Tanner's busted!

He's busted by the US Army but good thing the G63 did the best it can.

Ssangyong Korando Turismo

Back in 2004, Ssangyong launched a multipurpose vehicle that some say, would be the take against other popular people carriers made by top Korean carmakers. When the Rodius first launched, this was the first MPV from Ssangyong that some say captures the essence of a luxury car and the practicality of the multipurpose passenger vehicle. Sadly though when one man caught the attention of the Rodius, one comment spurred onto his mind...IT'S UGLY.

Yes, the Rodius is one ugly specimen built by the Koreans despite the fact that it was designed by a Brit. So ugly, it was named "the ugliest car ever made" according to CarData. Too many criticisms spurred about its hideous looks so in 2011, the Rodius was axed...but in the summer of 2012, it came back (oh no) and it comes with the e-XDi200 diesel engine that produces 155PS of power and is available in either a 6-speed MT or an E-Tronic Benz 5-speed AT.

After being on the block for 9 years, it seems that the Rodius finally gets a replacement and what could that be? Something that is better looking than the Rodius? Well, ladies and gents, Ssangyong's new MPV, the Korando Turismo, is the answer and...

2014 Ssangyong Korando Turismo

2014 Ssangyong Korando Turismo

...just as I thought. For a minivan that once "that looks like it got bottled in a pub brawl and stitched back together by a blind man", seems that the design flaw's getting worse than I expected. I mean look at the front view, that's not quite very nice. Another thing that is not nice is when someone's in a Speedo and middle-aged people started to scream and the police warned him of gross indecency. The new Korando Turismo though is just another gross indecency on the road ahead. Despite calling this a much-improved version of the Rodius it replaces, I wouldn't mind calling it another candidate for being "the worst car in the history of the world".

2014 Ssangyong Korando Turismo interior

2014 Ssangyong Korando Turismo interior

On the inside, heh, same old Rodius interior with the same old 11-seater capacity. Seems that there's nothing special about the new Korando Turismo's interior here but still, 11-seaters on a minivan is quite a rare feast for those who love people carriers. Imagine that, you can bring the whole family on a vacation trip to Jeju Island, take a ski trip to Pyeongchang, or cruise in style at Gangnam or whatever you want but in the Korando Turismo, I'm sorry to say that these don't work because it's still even uglier than the Rodius it replaces.

Powering the Korando Turismo is the same old e-XDi200 diesel engine as the old Rodius. You still expect the same 155HP of power output and the same transmission choices of either a 6-speed manual or an E-Tronic Benz 5-speed AT. In terms of driving feel, this is worse than I thought. Even though you are in a standard FR layout or with the 4WD layout, the feeling of driving a Korando Turismo is like something's bothering your ear. Feels like your ear's going to clog with some watery stuff and no matter how many times you're trying to unclog it with either your finger or a cotton swab, it clogs again. It's as difficult as pinching your pimples from your face until that yellowy stuff from your pimples is blown away.

So what we have here is a new MPV that looks even worse than the Rodius it replaces while retaining the same Rodius interior and the same engine that powers it but sadly though, this is not recommended for those who need clever sophistication. Besides, I wouldn't want one of these in my whole life unless someone's gonna use it for target practice in a remote province. The Korando Turismo from Ssangyong is horrid in the driver's eyes and even horrid for those who owned one. End of discussion.

AVAILABLE COLORS: Grand White, Space Black, Fine Silver, Cyber Gray, and Wine Black.

PRICE LIST:

코란도 투리스모 GT 2WD A/T - 29,480,000 Won
코란도 투리스모 GT 4WD A/T - 31,180,000  Won
코란도 투리스모 LT 2WD A/T - 26,770,000  Won
코란도 투리스모 LT 4WD A/T - 28,540,000  Won
코란도 투리스모 RT 2WD A/T - 33,940,000  Won
코란도 투리스모 RT 4WD A/T - 35,640,000 Won
코란도 투리스모 LT 2WD M/T - 24,800,000 Won

Photo: Ssangyong Motor Company

Forza Horizon: Pure Handling Delight

I didn't realize that this is happened. This is REALLY REALLY happened in the world of Forza. It seems that Subaru's first ever rear-wheel drive car, the BRZ, showed up as the star car of the February Jalopnik Car Pack and wow! Would you look at that, the FR-S twin from the Pleiades has finally been showed up to the party...

Better late than never but never mind the buzzcocks anyway because there is more than that when it comes to talk about the BRZ's arrival on Horizon...

A New Beginning

First and foremost, some people say they see some differences because both the FR-S (that's 86 to you and me) and the BRZ have slightly different faces. You can see them from their trapezoid-ish grille, the bumper design, and the headlight designs. As for the rear, well, everything's the same.

I See...No Difference

Some people say that in terms of handling, both the FR-S and the BRZ are the same but analysts say that their behaviors are different rather than being genetic twins from the Toyobaru cooperative. Analysts said that the BRZ has been given some mature suspension setup while the FR-S is focused to be more tail-happy so in short, the BRZ is a serious version of the fun-loving FR-S. While the FR-S does the troublemaking like a street fighter, the BRZ has some spartan driving manners. Despite that, they both love to drift in the open road.

Don't mind the Skyline on your right

By the first time I get inside the BRZ, I'm still ain't bovvered about this car even though it's just the Scooby version of the FR-S but after driving this car for several hours, I am relieved that the BRZ was deserved to be in Car Heaven, something that wants to spend all day partying at the ultimate automotive sandbox that is Horizon. I thought I'm going to hate this because of that moment that was foretold last year but all is forgiven when the producers gave the Subaru BRZ a chance of stardom in the world of Forza. You wouldn't even bothered driving one of these and give it some mods like every "Speedo Boys" do to their Japanese imports in Colorado. Wait a minute, why did I keep saying that? Speedo Boy? Forget about that...

Hidden in plain sight

BRZ doing tunnel runs...

It's good to see the Subaru BRZ featured on Forza Horizon via DLC but sadly though, I'm not sure if I'm going to like it or not. Despite that, let's just stick to the part that I like this car probably because it's boxer rear-wheel drive idea has some party animal instincts to rock the ultimate car enthusiast's sandbox only on XBOX 360.

Renault Clio/Lutecia IV Estate

2013 Renault Clio Estate

Couple of months has passed since the Renault Clio/Lutecia IV has arrived in the European market and I am starting to think this is the better looking Clio to date not only because it comes with Renault's new corporate look but it's because of the tech-savvy features including the Renault R-Link feature that lets me connect to music, navigation, and other points of interests I'm particularly interested in. For this new model, the new Clio targets the Astra, the Golf, the new Seat Leon, and other hatchbacks from its category and with the starter price of just 13,700 Euros, this new model is a bargain of its own right.

Come to think of it, there are some customers who want to put something more at the but, say a kayak or some camping equipment or tons of grocery shopping or any other heavy duty stuff to consider, seems that the new Clio IV's boot space just wasn't enough. Also, what if they need something a bit family-oriented, something that brings a typical French family to an average weekend trip to grandma's house or a knick-knack shop or a bungalow or any other destination the dad might consider? Well, there's an additional variant you might be interested in...the Estate version...

Even though it's a sports wagon version of the highly addictive Renault Clio IV it still comes with the tech-savvy features, especially the Renault R-Link feature for some connectivity pleasures for the driver who loves the techie in himself. This is just like when the kid-in-himself likes a delicious bowl of cereal while the grown up-in-himself likes the kid-in himself. Need to state the point again? Ahem, "the kid-in-me likes this bowl of cereal but the grown-up-in-me likes the kid-in-me". He he he he....

Besides, engine choices from the hatchback version carried on to the estate version, meaning I can expect a 0.9 12v Energy TCe, a 1.2 16V 75, a 1.5 8v dCi 75, or a 1.5 8v Energy dCi 90 engine, all being mated with a standard 5-speed manual transmission, which sounds to be desperate for a family-friendly station wagon version of a Clio.

Anyway, about the Estate version, this model's thirty percent bigger than the already much-roomy hatchback model and the sill has been made significally lower. With the combination of both the cargo area's flat floor and the foldable front passenger seat, the Clio IV Estate has a good load length, more than enough to carry a kayak or some camping equipment or tons of grocery shopping or any other heavy duty stuff to consider. I mean, not only this was made for the average French family but, it's made for those who really want to experience the great outdoors or even a Spring Break if you have buddies coming with you.

I mean yes, this new Clio Estate is a versatile and practical car for the Traveler's Tales, a car only someone who has a taste of poetry, art, and science can be seduced by such beauty of the new Clio's overall design. Sure, the hatchback's design of the Clio/Lutecia IV is a winner for me but the station wagon's look need to be a bit more sophisticated than its new and upcoming rivals from the block. It's an affordable car with some inner fancy living that tickles your fancy but still, I would rather wait for the upcoming Renaultsport Clio 200 because this kid ain't BOVVERED! Is it bovvered? Is it bovvered, though? Look at its face! Is this face bovvered? Face? Bovvered? It ain't BOVVERED! He he he....

Photo: Renault

Driving Music (What is the name of the song on car commercial?) Vol. 47

Sigh....After a whole day spending several hours at the Super Bowl yesterday, looks like more are still figuring out which of the Super Bowl 47 ads are the best. Since this Driving Music segment is so special, I'll be tackling Game Day-related car commercial songs, songs that you've heard at certain game-day car commercials and instead of just five, I'll be listing the songs heard in Game Day car commercials. Ready? Go!

1) Sympathy for the Devil by Rolling Stones - from the Mercedes-Benz USA CLA-Class "Soul" Game Day ad

2)  Metal Health by Quiet Riot from the Hyundai Santa Fe "Team" Game Day ad

3) Sun Blows Up Today by Flaming Lips - from the Hyundai Santa Fe "Epic Play Date" Game Day ad

4) I Wish by Skee-lo - from the Toyota USA RAV4 "Wish Granted" Game Day ad

5) Come On Get Happy by Jimmy Cliff - from the VW USA "Get Happy" Game Day ad

6) Can't Win Em All by Hanni El Khatib - from the Audi USA "Prom" Game Day ad

...huh guess I can only do six driving songs from Game Day car ads....oh well, good luck finding those songs and relieve the moments!